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Storytelling with Puck.

The lift:
Carol Long


The lift by Carol Long

The short old lady with glossy black hair frowned up at the large man, “Jim if you hadn’t have taken so long to park properly, we would not have missed our appointment"

“Mother, we missed our appointment because we are stuck in their lift. They will understand when we explain.” Jim replied.

The tall young lady whispers conspiratorially to the young boy, “My grandmother would say the same!”

“My grandma is upstairs. I ran away.”

“You ran away from your grandmother?”

“No, from the doctor” replied the boy sternly.

“Why?"

“He wanted to take off my moustache. I glued it on. Superglue. It will only come off when my own moustache grows."

“How old are you?” asked the old lady.

“I’m eight. How old are you?” a defiant tone had snuck into the boy’s voice to match his spiky brown hair.

“You’re quite right. I was rude. Let me introduce myself. My name is Sangeetha. I am sixty-five. This is my son Jim, who is forty-five but pretends he’s younger. You can tell he is old and bald.”

“And he has a white beard”

“Clever boy. See Jim, this boy can see. I can’t keep calling you ‘boy’ - that’s rude too.”

“My name is Max"

“Pleased to meet you Max.”

Jim is smiling indulgently at is mother. “And Max has green eyes like you too.”

“Jim is my blue-eyed boy, just like his father, and he makes those eyes sparkle at young ladies.” Sangeetha giggled and grinned at the girl in the corner of the lift.

Jim followed his mother’s gaze and smiled broadly at the younger woman, raising his eyebrows, and opening his eyes wide. “I think we will be here a while. The alarm stopping means someone knows the lift is stuck and has turned it off. We are quite safe.”

“I hate lifts! Why did I listen to you? Of course, I could just walk up nine floors to prenatal classes in this state. You should have let me come alone. Now the lift is stuck.” Nervously, she played with her long blond hair.

Jim reached out and took her hand. “Now that is my fault! Max, this is Alessandra my daughter-in-law. Last month, she married my son on her twenty-first birthday. Then he went to work on a ship. He told me I had to look after her. So, I bring her to the hospital and try to make her look after herself. When he gets home, I will get the blame for taking his pregnant wife into a broken lift. Do you think that’s fair?”

Max looked into Alessandra face and studied her kind brown eyes. “She just wants to make her own decisions. Like you and me.”

The joyous giggle that rose from Alessandra was joined by a chuckle from Sangeetha. Max looked uncertainly at Jim. Jim’s serious look was cracking and soon Max laughed too.

The lift engineer’s face appears as the doors cracked open. “Is everything ok?”

“Yes. No problems here. How long?” asks Jim

“About 5 minutes”

“Thought you said five months for a moment. We’d be bringing my grandchild into the world in a lift and my son would never forgive me!”

“Jim!” cried Alessandra and Sangeetha in unison, and the laughter started again.


An experiment

You may have noticed that these characters have appeared a few times in Storytelling with Puck’s 2023 stories. That was the intention. Each participant in our workshop was given the same setting and the same characters to work with. They had 45 minutes to come up with a story and as hoped, each one was entirely different.

Carol’s story had an even bigger twist. She had decided to test the newly released Chat GPT. Her experiment challenged us to tell the difference between the story she wrote and the one generated by artificial intelligence. You’ll surely agree that the difference is stark but how will its capabilities develop over time? Read both stories and Carol’s full explanation on LinkedIn.




© Puck Creations 2024